In light of Eugene Melnyk’s recent refusal to sell the Ottawa Senators, Devcore Canderel DLS Group has made a bid to create a new AHL franchise called the Ottawa Parliamentarians, which would be captained by none other than Daniel Alfredsson. In addition to the stick-wielding Swede, the Parliamentarians will also feature other prominent Ottawa Senators, NHL free agents and recently retired players from leagues around the world.
On the right wing for the new Ottawa franchise will be Jaromir Jagr, the ageless Czech wonder who led countless teams to epic Stanley Cup runs in the NHL. To complement the two aforementioned superstars, the left wing will feature former Sens sensation Alexei Yashin, who will be making a highly anticipated return to Ottawa.
The Parliamentarians’ scout was able to track down Yashin, now 42 years old, in Siberia, where he was serving the first year of a 5 year exile. The Ottawa team paid off local officials for his release on the condition that Yashin sign a 4 year contract with the Parliamentarians.
The main defensive pair will be comprised of Henry Burris, who plays football for the Ottawa RedBlacks during the AHL offseason and current Barefax manager Patrick Brazeau. Dion Phaneuf offered to join the team once his contract expires, but the Parliamentarians declined to pick up his contract.
The goaltender will of course be none other than Ray Emery, who’s spent the last year playing in the AHL with other franchises. Some have asked what will happen if Devcore does not win the Lebreton contract, but Jean Pierre Poulin (President) seems confident the team will flourish in Ottawa regardless..