Category: News

As it has done for the previous 12 years, The Ottawa District Canine Union 783 has submitted their yearly list of suggestions and recommendations to increase canine satisfaction through Ottawa-Carleton area. City Hall considered the group’s recommendations this past Monday. The 2016 list is primarily centered around park quality, fire hydrant density, and Leash Laws.

The group recommends implementing a “pay to play” policy at popular downtown parks. A spokesman for ODCU claims that a 1-2 dollar fee to enter the park would allow for upgrades such as fountains, communal toys, and cover cleanup costs resulting from delinquent dog owners unable to control their canine’s output. Some critics say a “pay to play” policy is a blatant discrimination on dogs with owners unable or unwilling to pay this fee.

The union also calls for a higher fire-hydrant density throughout the downtown core. Some dog’s rights advocates claim that many of the hydrants in the Byward Market are overcrowded and that the cost associated with additional hydrants would be minimal but would result in a noticeable improvement in the quality of life for downtown dogs. Sweden implemented a hydrant enrichment program in the late ‘90s and has noticed staggering increases in canine happiness polls. An unexpected side-effect was a net decrease in fire damage in each year.

Interest groups such as Canines Without Collars have lobbied to pass the controversial “Laxer Leash Law” which would allow working class dogs who serve on a municipal level, such as K-9s, to go leashless in municipal buildings and parks. The proposed law is also expected to include expanded rights for collar selection. Currently, municipal working dogs are entitled to a standard issue collar of a single solid colour of the dog’s choice, excluding fluorescent colours. This new measure would allow fluorescent colours to become available for selection by the service dogs.

Most residents are ecstatic about these changes and wish all the best to the dogs, particularly those that select fluorescent coloured collars. However, local Dion Pantouf does not agree “First we got Lassie wearing a pink collar, next we got Larry wearing a pink scarf…. where do we draw the line?”

City Hall has not made a final decision on the recommendations; however, the Canine Union has made clear that if the City does not comply, things could get ‘ruff’.

While many Canadians enjoyed the mild beginning of Winter, some were struggling with the lack of snow. Hau Tran has worked as independent snow plower in the Ottawa-Gatineau area for the last 10 years, and says that this season began particularly slowly for him. The lack of snow this season understandably drove him to desperation.

“There was just no snow. Even worse, not even close to snow. 16 degrees in December? It was outrageous,” explained Tran, “I could barely pay the insurance for my plow that month. On Boxing Day, I decided that enough was enough. I summoned the Dark Lord and told him I would do anything for Ottawa to receive a real winter. As you can see, I think I bit off more than I could chew.”

On December 29th, Ottawa was hit with 25 cm of snow, and has been barraged with precipitation and icy temperatures ever since. With more storms expected in the coming weeks, citizens can contact Mr. Tran for snow removal or to thank him for the weather by email at: haucanplow [at] demonfire [dot] org.

The City of Ottawa and the National Capital Commission (NCC) have finalized plans to rebury the Rideau Canal in central Ottawa, between Mooney’s Bay and the Ottawa River.

The waterway is undergoing its annual transition into the world’s largest skating rink, and was designated a National Historic Site, which required countless hoops to jump through before finalizing its reburial.

“We’re excited that we could get this done in time for St. Patrick’s Day,” says NCC representative Janice McDowell, “it will mean the world to the descendants of the Irish labourers who were used and abused nearly two hundred years ago.” Some are less excited, including local business owners whose business rely on the tourist attraction, particularly during the winter.

McDowell isn’t concerned, “What’s the big deal here? It was meant in case of war with the States but we never used for that reason, so let’s build a road, a park, a rail, anything else really. We could even build a large skating rink and still save money. Besides, what else are we supposed to do with all the dirt we’re digging up from the LRT tunnel?”

As for the Irish descendants, are they as excited as McDowell? “Yeah, this really isn’t something we care about, but good for Ottawa…I guess,” said local resident Brian Finnegan.